Can you forgive?

What is forgiveness?

Forgiveness is the action or process of being forgiven or forgiving. Just type in google "forgiveness" and you get some interesting web definitions such as "giving up the right for revenge " or "quit counting a wrong against the wrong-doer."

It really comes down to the question of am I willing to stop blaming or being angry with someone?

Life is all about experiences and learning from them. Yes, we do go through some tough times but what is the point of keeping all this anger and resentment inside? The only person this emotion affects is the person holding the grudge. How can you let it all go? That might truly take a lifetime for some people.

I talk a lot about forgiveness with my patients because it is a necessary step in healing your body and your relationship with others. Many people might not realize that they actually have a deep grudge that can affect their spirit and eventually their health. Love and forgiveness is something so important in this lifetime and a necessary step in the healing process.

In chinese medicine, the heart is one of the organs affected with emotions. It is not only an organ but a vessel for the spirit to connect with the mind. There is even a time associated with the abundance of heart Qi (or energy) from 11am to 1pm (the best time to contemplate matters of the heart).

Why am i talking about the heart? Well when there's an imbalance in our spirit and our mind the heart is usually affected. People come in with heart palpitations, insomnia, anxiety, poor memory, panic attacks, ulcers and not being able to experience the joy in life. I noticed a correlation with these symptoms with people unable to forgive a past event.

What are some steps that you can take to let go?

I always tell my family, friend's, and patients that they have to give themselves a timeframe for grief, upset, anger, sadness whatever it is and then after that time to let it all go. For instance, when I'm angry I just say that I'll be angry for 1 hour and I can scream, punch a pillow, make a fuss and get it all out (of course don't hurt anyone) then after that hour I'm done. No more thinking about the upset, it is over.  Then I move on with my life with grace.

You can also take affective action by actually confronting the person who has caused your pain in a healthy way.  This can break the chain of hard feelings. Look at them and truly believe in your heart what you are about to say "No matter what you have done to me. I forgive you."

Call them up and talk to them about your upset. A lot of people don't even realize that they have hurt someone.  Or you can write a letter and if you are to afraid to send it just burn it up and say to yourself "I forgive (insert person's name) for what they have done."  Just sending out that message of forgiving someone into the universe already changes your health.

You should always set up boundaries and keep yourself healthy and safe. This doesn't mean that you have to be friends with that person or even get back into a relationship. It just means that you will no longer hold that bad thought in your body and you will move on with your life with no more upset. There are even so many stories of men and women forgiving their loved one's killers. Now that is forgiveness...

When you finally forgive, your heart will feel so much lighter and there will be peace of mind. We are all on a journey together in this world and have done things to make others upset or have gotten upset. We are born with emotions and thought process so that we can learn from life experiences.


It took a long time for me to forgive someone who hurt me deeply. But I finally came to terms with my experience and realized that millions of people face an event in their lives that has created a deep wound in their heart. Life is full of suffering and also full of joy. When you keep the pain inside, it not only transforms your thought processes but it can affect your health.

The act of forgiving can set your heart free from that wound. Wouldn't that be wonderful!?

It Only Takes a Girl

I just watched a beautiful and inspiring video by a passionate student educating the serious need to change the plight of young girls forced into early marriage, raped, infected with HIV/AIDS and then having premature pregnancies in developing countries.

Her video has gone viral and has already made a difference by educating those who are unaware of how vast this problem is around the world. Please take a moment to watch the video and check out her blog http://itonlytakesagirl.blogspot.com/ to find out how to donate, help, and learn more!

Just being aware can make a difference.

Getting a Good Night's Sleep!

Trouble Sleeping? 

I know I have many nights when I can't seem to fall asleep or stay asleep. I also have a lot of people that come in for acupuncture sessions with sleeping issues especially because of how much it has affected their mental health.

Having a good night's sleep is essential to your physical health and wellbeing. In animal studies, sleep is necessary for SURVIVAL. What does that mean? That means sleep deprivation can affect our immune systems and in the long run affect our memory and physical abilities. Some experts also believe that our neurons have a chance to repair themselves while we are in deep sleep.

Even the term "Beauty sleep"has some validity because as we sleep proteins are broken down and cells repair damages from factors like stress and ultraviolet rays.

So what can you do to get a better's night sleep?

I happen to read a great article in Woman's Day magazine called "Sleep better tonight."They had awesome tips from sunrise to sunset in order to really impact your sleep. Here are some of the important tips that I will be sharing with you today!

1. DON'T HIT THAT SNOOZE BUTTON
    Yeah i was surprised about this one.  I always thought I was getting just a few more minutes of shut-eye but in reality just trying to fall back asleep takes so much energy that once you wake up again you really don't get any additional deep sleep.

2. EXERCISE
   Exercise in the morning helps you have energy throughout the day and can decrease stress hormones. This can help you wind down and fall asleep faster. The caveat is that vigorous exercise leading to bedtime can actually have the reverse effects.

In a recent study, by Scott Collier, PhD, director of the Vascular Biology of Autonomic Studies Laboratory, people who got 30 minutes of moderate exercise at 7 A.M. (compared to 1PM and 7PM) significantly improved the quality of their sleep that night, spending 75% more time in deep sleep. So Exercise and try to do it in the morning!

3. Cut out CAFFEINE
     This is one of the hardest things that I find my patients have trouble with and can be a hard thing to do for a lot of people. Caffeine is a stimulant and can stay in your system for 4 to 7 hours. As long as you don't have caffeine still in your system before bedtime, then you can have a better nights sleep. The only thing is that caffeine is not only in coffee: tea, chocolate and soft drinks also contain enough caffeine to affect your sleep. Avoid that extra cup of coffee in the afternoon and you will get more sleep!

4. EAT DINNER 2-3 HOURS BEFORE BEDTIME
     Ever wonder why you couldn't sleep after a heavy meal? Your body needs at least 2-3 hours to digest food. If you eat closer to bedtime, your body has a harder time to rest because your stomach is still working. Fatty foods take a lot of work on your stomach and keep you up. Try to make dinnertime earlier in the evening and eat a lighter meal. Be cautious of spicy or acidic foods as they can cause heartburn.

5. BEDTIME RITUAL
     We live in a fast-pace world and it's always go go go. Wake up, go to work, go eat, go workout, go take care of the kids, go do this, go do that etc.

The most simple and rewarding thing to do is just have a nice ritual before sleeping. What do I mean by ritual? Your body needs a transition from moving all day to lying still in bed.  By washing your face, taking off your makeup and doing something relaxing like reading a book, can trigger signals in your brain that your day's over and it's time to sleep.

Shut down that computer or T.V! These two stimulate the nervous system making it harder to unwind.

Also, get into bed and do a light 30 second stretch with a few deep breaths. This can help you relax
under the sheets.

I hope these tips helps you get a good nights sleep. I know I will be trying them tonight!